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15 Funny Things You Should Avoid in Classroom

AZ — Tue, 01 Dec 2009 10:00:08 +0000

Fifteen things you should not do in the classroom

It’s great being a student. The school can be fun, but also a lot of hard work. You want to do well in school. This is no time to Goof off and act like a fool. However, some students do not know how to behave. These are the things for fifteen years not to do or have in the classroom:

1. Do not fall asleep in class. The next dream that you have to be in the principal’s office.
2. Do not swear or yell obscenities. Remember: You want to get at least a B in his class and not a degree.
3. Do not wear low cut tank tops, or hats in the classroom. If it looks bad or wrong, it probably is.
4. Do not use nose rings or any other appropriate body sharps. If you can not pass the metal detector does not go to school.
5. No video games, cell phones, MP3 players or other electronic devices designed to drive your teacher crazy. So call me old-fashioned. You can make your work with an abacus. Eventually, you will be able to do some work on computers. Our teams are only ten years.
6. No spit balls and throwing decisions across the classroom. You know you is you are doing. Now stop it!
7. No heavy breathing in the classroom. This is allowed only if you have an asthmatic condition. Make sure you bring a note from your doctor.
8. They do not sing in the classroom. Leave for the choir. Screeching is not the same as speaking.
9. Do not cheat on their tests. Remember: I have eyes in the back of the head. By the way, I’m secretly an alien. If I catch cheating, he vaporized.
10. No kissing, hugging or kissing in the classroom. I just want to see you kiss is your final exam.
11. Absolutely not fart in the classroom. I have a smell detector. If you pass the gas will be sent out of class.
12. Do not pick your nose in the classroom. Stay home if you have a cold. I’m not doing a conference on Boogertown.
13. Do not leave your desk a disaster or in the soil around a disaster. Remember: If your desk is not clean, I will be average. We serve an arrest of an hour with a server.
14. Do not eat in the classroom. You can wait until lunchtime. If I see a drink in his mouth, spat. Also, do not chew gum in class. If I see gum blowing, the day is done in the classroom.
15. Do not hit or push anyone into the classroom. If you do not like someone in the class, only pretend. I see a lot of smiles and shining faces. Make your teacher happy so you can retire with his health intact.

Psychology students are more funny than others [Clever]

AZ — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 06:06:39 +0000

An eccentric philosophy professor gave a review of a final question, after a semester dealing with a wide range of topics.

The class was already seated and ready for when the professor took his chair, slumped on his desk and wrote on the board: “Using everything we have learned this semester, prove that this chair does not exist.”

Fingers flew, erasers erased, notebooks were filled with a furious manner. Some students wrote over 30 pages in an hour of trying to disprove the existence of the chair. A member of the class however, got up and finished in less than a minute.

Weeks later, when the notes were issued, the rest of the group wondered how he could have got one thing “A”, when he had written to all. His response was two words:

“What chair?”

10 Fun Things to do in Boring Lecture [Funny]

AZ — Wed, 28 Oct 2009 06:50:49 +0000

1 – Bring a Blowhorn
Use it when you ask or answer a question

2 – Hire a Video Crew to come to the Class.
If asked about it, say that you have to tape the lecture for a friend.

3 – When the professor asks a question, raise your hand
If the professor calls on you, point to someone in the next row and say “He Knows.” Pick a different person each time.

4 – Bring a typewriter.
Use it to take notes

5 – Get up to go to the bathroom five or six times during the class.
Change clothes every time.

6 – Pretend to be asleep until five minutes before the end of class.
Then wake up and explain that you missed the lecture, and ask the professor to summarize
what he/she talked about.

7 – Bring a tape player and a tape of a thunderstorm.
Keep it hidden. Sometime during the lecture, start the tape, stand up, claim that the professor has angered the gods and leave. Watch to see how many students follow you after the tape starts playing.

8 – Claim that you are the new student teacher.
and that you are to give the lecture for that class. If the professor agrees, lecture on a subject completely
opposite the to subject of the class. If the professor objects, say that the students should have a wide range of knowledge.

9 – Ask questions in a foreign language you know the professor doesn’t know.
Act angry when he/she doesn’t understand you.

10 – Bring a tape player and a tape of the school bell. Play it every 15 minutes.

15 Funny Quotes in Music Class from Students [Funny]

AZ — Tue, 25 Aug 2009 06:14:29 +0000

Here are some funny quotes from students on music exams:

01 – The principal singer of nineteenth century opera was called pre-Madonna.

02 – Gregorian chant has no music, just singers singing the same lines.

03 – Sherbet composed the Unfinished Symphony.

04 – All female parts were sung by castrati. We don’t know exactly what they sounded like because there are no known descendants.

05 – Young scholars have expressed their rapture for the Bronze Lullaby, the Taco Bell Cannon, Beethoven’s Erotica, Tchaikovsky Cracknutter Suite, and Gershwin’s Rap City in Blue.

06 – Music sung by two people at the same time is called a duel; if they sing without music it is called Acapulco.

07 – A virtuoso is a musician with real high morals.

08 – Contralto is a low sort of music that only ladies sing.

09 – Probably the most marvelous fugue was the one between the Hatfields and the McCoys.

10 – A harp is a nude piano.

11 – Refrain means don’t do it. A refrain in music is the part you’d better not try to sing.

12 – I know what a sextet is but I’d rather not say.

13 – My favorite composer was Opus. Agnus Dei was a woman composer famous for her church music.

14 – Johann Sebastian Bach wrote a great many musical compositions and had a large number of children. In between he practiced on an old spinster which he kept up in his attic.

15 – Rock Monanoff was a famous post-romantic composer of piano concerti.

Life’s tough, but it’s even tougher when you’re stupid [Funny Students]

AZ — Sat, 15 Aug 2009 06:20:42 +0000

A classroom full of first year Veterinary students were participating in their first day of anatomy class. For the lecture, the professor begins by unveiling a dead cow under a white sheet laying on an operating table.

The professor tells the class “In Veterinary Medicine, there are two qualities you must possess as a doctor – the first of which is a strong stomach. You cannot, under any circumstance, be disgusted by anything involving an animal’s body.”Cow

For example, the Professor pulls back the sheet and sticks his finger right up the dead cow’s butt, pulls out his finger and sticks it in his mouth. The students just standthere, paralyzed at what they see. “Now, go ahead and do the same thing, each of you,” the professor says.

Freaked out, the students take several minutes but eventually take turns sticking their fingers up into the anal cavity of the dead cow, and then sucking on them. Once everyone is finished, the Professor continues on with his lesson… “Now, the second important quality you must possess is a keen observation. You see, I stuck in my middle finger up the cow’s butt, and I sucked on my index finger… Now, learn to pay attention.”

I Got a Pea [Funny Video]

AZ — Tue, 11 Aug 2009 06:29:47 +0000

“I Got A Pea”is a funny song for kids by Bryant Oden, who did “The Duck Song” and “Bob the Snail”.

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12 Q&A from Real Students [Funny]

AZ — Tue, 04 Aug 2009 06:25:42 +0000

1. What happens to your body as you age?
When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.

2. What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.

3. What is artificial insemination?
When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow.

4. How can you delay milk turning sour?
Keep it in the cow.

5. How are the main parts of the body categorized?
The body is consisted into three parts – the brainium, the borax the abdominal cavity. The branium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels, A,E,I,O and U.

6. What is the Fibula?
A small lie.

7. What does “varicose” mean?
Nearby.

8. What is the most common form of birth control?
Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium.

9. Give the meaning of the term “Caesarean Section.”
The caesarean section is a district in Rome.

10. What is a seizure?
A Roman emperor.

11. What is a terminal illness?
When you are sick at the airport

12. Give an example of a fungus. What is a characteristic feature?
Mushrooms. They always grow in damp places and they look like umbrellas.

Medical Students Life Song (Funny)

AZ — Wed, 17 Jun 2009 07:08:23 +0000

A music video describing the life of a medical student Funny Video.

The most time consuming and hardest schooling around is probably the Medical School in which you spend like eight or more years of your life. Medical students always seem to feel that they need to study constantly, but if you want to stay sane, you need to take a break sometimes. Watch this funny video of medical students how they snatched some time out of their busy routines and did this hilarious thing.

5 Reasons to Bunk Your Class [Funny]

AZ — Thu, 16 Apr 2009 08:39:28 +0000

Although it sounds bad, but there are always some reasons. Bunking a class(es) can actually improve your performance. Here are 5 reasons on why should break the rule and go out, when you are not supposed to go.

1 – Independence
An independent person can only lead a successful life. If he/she has independent ideas and thinking it will become easier for him to take decisions in future.

2 – Improved academics performance
If you bunk your class, you won’t know how a particular problem has been solved, or how a particular thing works. So what if you were absent. You will spend more time with the books and hence use your brains. So you are not just a robot.

3 – Good relationship with teachers
When you bunk, you don’t get attendance. So you go up to your teachers for some help (jugaad). So the harmony between the teacher and the student increases

4 – More Fun
The most obvious reason is fun. Increase your awareness by spending quality time with your friends.

5 – Get Peace
Yes,you get peace. The cacophonous class can make you distasteful and hence make you more irritable. So you get what the world wants, “peace “

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